Tag Archives: feminism

Dolly & Gloria

advocacy, books, politics, reading, thinking out loud, ,

Gloria Steinem’s death came just a few days after that of Dolly Parton. They seemed to be two women who spun in very different orbits. However, their lives intertwined in a way that shows that feminism is more complex than the anti-woke crowd would have us believe.

Ms. Magazine republished Steinem’s 1987 tribute to Parton, the year the latter was named of the magazine’s Women of the Year. (Days later, the same magazine published a tribute to its founder.)

I encourage you to read both articles. For me, the most powerful statement is Steinem’s simple but powerful definition of feminism: “If feminism means each of us finding our unique power, and helping other women do the same, Dolly Parton certainly has done both.”

I think Steinem gets it right and it is simple. Everyone gets to discover and embody their unique power. Create a life that makes sense for them as individuals. Define themselves in ways that make them feel whole. That’s it: no one is forcing anyone to live as a trad wife or a childless cat woman. Have babies, don’t have babies; get married, don’t get married; work outside the home, don’t work outside the home. You get to choose.

If early feminists were evangelical in their quest to get women out of the home and into the world, it was because of the context of the times. Women were ruled by men in their personal, professional and financial lives. Opportunities to work outside the home were limited and often ended upon pregnancy. Even as late as 2008, I had a man tell me that, if he was able to provide continuing grant support for a project, he would probably only be able to keep on my male colleague since he had a family to support. I was married without children at the time so I suppose he thought I was working for fun even though I was actively consulting and finishing up a doctorate.

I was born on the cusp of the first and second waves of feminism. One of the best books I’ve read that shares the experiences of my mother’s generation is The Book Club for Troublesome Women. Here’s my review from LibraryThing:

“The Book Club for Troublesome Women showed up in my Hoopla recommendations. Four women in the new suburbs of Northern Virginia come together to read Betty Friedan’s The Feminine Mystique even as the world and their lives are changing irrevocably in the early 1960s. Bostwick’s story was heart wrenching in many ways as we see women belittled by the world, and in many cases, their own husbands. But Bostwick also explores ideas about how the enforced roles of women required enforced roles for men who may not find bread winning to be their real desire. Of course, there are pretty petty men as well, and I found myself shouting “a*****e” a few times along the way.

She weaves history into the story as the women in Concordia, Virginia, were right on the doorstep of the March on Washington and lived through the assassination of Kennedy. We see them grappling with their changing roles, coming to understand the importance not just of friendship but also mentorship. And, I am a huge fan of Katherine Graham who shows up as herself and provides some support for one of the characters in the novel. It felt a little “Forrest Gumpy” but helped underline the turmoil of those years.”

We grieve the loss of these women. We watch in horror as their work is belittled and dismantled. So, we do what people have always done: we pick up the mantle and march on. Labor Day is a great day to write a letter to your legislator to let them know where you stand on the issues.

Grumpy Old Childless Cat Lady

art, politics, thinking out loud, ,

I am going to keep this short and sweet: the notion that I don’t have a stake in the future because I did not give birth is laughable. Also, I am not miserable. I certainly do not want others to be miserable. What I really want is to be left alone to make personal, private decisions.

I could go on but, thankfully, Moira Donegan from The Guardian said it perfectly: we are looking directly into the face of patriarchy.

Meanwhile, I am actually feeling more optimistic than I have for some time. I have made creativity a priority this summer so spend less time doom scrolling and more time creating. I turned some of my gel prints into zines, and then was inspired by a variety of Instagram accounts to add interactivity. Here’s what I created:

Grumpy Old Lady, Part 2

Making, Media, Television, thinking out loud,

I have been binge watching Maine Cabin Masters. I love the series with its fun ideas for refurbishing old camps and captivating panoramas of Maine along with glimpses of loons and beavers. There are great family stories, too, that come along with the camps, many of which are at least a hundred years old.

But, the main sponsor is a new series called Home Sweet Rome. The series features a young woman, pre-teenish?, whose father marries an Italian woman and moves her to Rome with him. Turns out Francesca is a pop star. In the promo, the narrator is excited and says, “Maybe someday I can be a pop star!”

Obviously, women can be anything they want, including a pop star. I support her dreams. But, my grumpy old lady voice is commenting in the background every time I hear the advertisement. Why couldn’t Francesca be a brain surgeon? Or a human rights attorney (think Amal Clooney)?

I am not so old that I cannot remember being her age, but I have also been a lifelong nerd. My dream job in 6th grade was to be President. Oh! Maybe the father could marry an Italian politician! Turns out there a few women moving into leadership in the country.

I am also not so obtuse to understand that I am clearly NOT the primary audience for this show. It is a bit odd, in this day and age of algorithms, that it is being pushed during a home improvement series.

I know, I know, before I judge, I should watch an episode or two. Maybe the pop star, giggly tone is masking a stronger social message? Kind of like Teen Vogue? Or a couple of recent Instagram posts where a woman starts talking about arranging flowers or making bouillabaisse, then after a moment says, “Ok, now that the men are gone, we need to talk about bringing down the patriarchy.”

I can certainly recommend the cabin masters series as easy watching but also fascinating from a maker perspective. The team works through design and implementation in unpredictable building and natural settings, often using repurposed materials and drawing on local Maine builders and artisans. They must, of course, consider functionality and safety but also focus on creating beautiful, customized living spaces.